This is the part of the video that made the least sense to him because he didn’t remember being at the concert, let alone performing. He took that as a good sign, the absence of location, of the where and the when of the world he helped create in that moment. Depending on the complexity, the music’s command over him elevated his command over this instrument, fused him with his partner musicians, making them one in their creation, oblivious to those with whom they shared until the final resolve. Then applause. The audience’s appreciation of what they’d just partaken sometimes extended to longer than the piece, protracting into the early morning the completion of a pre-arranged set list.
The stadium held ninety thousand souls, adding another ten thousand when you opened the field for seating. Far more than ten thousand people were on the ground level that night. The video showed them shoulder to shoulder, dangerously tight ranks. Their applause wasn’t applause. It was a solid roar of white noise thatcreated a palpable blanket over all of them, fusing them to one another as a solid mass, a single surface, a floor.
And so, he walked out among them. And as he walked, he grew. The further and deeper into their midst he strode, the greater he became. The greater he became, the fewer souls remained upon which to walk. He walked until exiting the stadium was a mere leap over a fence. And then he disappeared.
Where was he, when this took place. He would like to have been there. That would have been an interesting experience, something to remember. Knowing what he knew about losing ones self in the moment of work, he understood the futility of his question. He could never have been there. That is why what happened, happened. And it would never have happened if he had been there.
How many other occasions had he fallen? One can only find ones self if one loses ones self. That two-edged sword remained at his side, always, until he would unsheathe it, jab the handle into the most convenient spot of earth, begin the piercing with the point to his chest near his heart, then forget as the music began.
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